The Dynamite Wrestling Manager

[klon]

David Hasselhoff, der neue General Manager, hat für den heutigen Dienstag eine Pressekonferenz angesetzt, um das neuartige Bachelor Of Xtreme-Konzept vorzustellen. Hier sehen wir die Pressekonferenz in ihrer Gesamtheit wie sie auf dem offiziellen YouTube-Kanal von TXW aufzurufen ist.

Reporter: "So, let's get straight to the point. What is the 'Bachelor Of Xtreme' all about?"

Hasselhoff: "Well, obviously it's about twenty women trying to bewitch a Xtreme Wrestler. No, just kidding. The Bachelor Of Xtreme is an effort to promote new talent to TXW. Our current roster has an average age of about 35 years. Not too old, but not very young either. We need to think about the long-term future of our sport. This is where the Bachelor Of Xtreme comes into play. This show is about promoting a young rookie to the main roster."

Reporter: "How exactly is this new show supposed to work?"

Hasselhoff: "We're going to have five young rookies aged between 16 and 24, which will be introduced later. These five rookies have recieved basic training by their mentors. During the events, we are going to have special lessions to teach the young guns the finesses of our great industry. During each week, we will see a match between two competitors held under special rules. After everyone has had two matches against every opponent, the one with most wins will win the title of Bachelor Of Xtreme."

Reporter: "This, however, begs the question: what does being the so-called 'Bachelor Of Xtreme' give you? How does it impact one's career, one's life?"

Hasselhoff: "The title of Bachelor Of Xtreme earns you a ten-year contract worth 5,000,000 €. Furthermore, the winner's first match on the TXW main roster will be a fight for the Xtreme Wrestling World Championship. However, not only the winner will get such a contract. Should the second-placed finisher manage to beat his Xtreme Wrestling Mentor in a singles match at Bloody Party #16 he will get said contract as well and the mentor will be released from his contract."

Reporter: "You mentioned special rules. What do these rules look like?"

Hasselhoff: "The rules of these matches are pretty simple: you can win by pinfall or submission in the ring or the area directly outside of the ring. The fight is divided into two rounds of four minutes with an eight minute break in between. Should neither combatant manage to win within these two rounds, a vote will decide the winner. This vote will be done by four 'judges': both mentors of the fighters involved in the match and the General Manager. For the first episode, the fourth judge will be the famous Dutch handball player Marieke van der Wal. Afterwards, the Xtreme Wrestling World Champion will take that place."

Reporter: "That sounds very great. When will the show be aired for the first time?"

Hasselhoff: "The first episode, seeing the match Artur Bril vs. Rene Cardinal, will be a live stream aired on the official TXW web page on the next Tuesday, 2 p.m. Central European Time. The event will be held in the Omnisport Apeldoorn and entry will be free. Yes, you heard right. TXW fans will see the newest talent of the sport for free!. After that, every episode will be uploaded to the official YouTube account of Total Xtreme Wrestling each Thursday. And now, please enjoy the introduction of the five rookies competing for the title of Bachelor Of Xtreme."

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Chikara Sato - 17 Years - Xtreme Wrestling Mentor: John Lafayette Cruise
About himself: "I've always been a great TXW fan and when I saw the ad for this show online I had to apply. I still can't believe they choose me."
About his strategy: "Well, I've had some training in amateur wrestling, so I will try to use that to full potential."
About his mentor: "Just a few months ago, I was watching Cruise-sensei on TV and now I'm his student. This is so amazing. I'm sure I can learn a lot from him."

Rene Cardinal - 18 Years - Xtreme Wrestling Mentor: David Flair
About himself: "I have lived all my life in the small city of Lingen and now I want to reach the very top! Nobody will stop me!"
About his strategy: "My style is very refined and technical, using submissions to make my opponents tap out."
About his mentor: "David Flair, just like me, had to fought an uphill battle against people not having respect for him - I think we will get along well."

Artur Bril - 19 Years - Xtreme Wrestling Mentor: Khris Germany
About himself: "Well, I've won gold at the first Youth Olympic Games in Singapore and after seeing the success other sports people had in wrestling, I wanted to be part of it as well."
About his strategy: "Seeing as I am a world champion of boxing, I will put my educated fists to very good use."
About his mentor: "Khris Germany is an amazing Xtreme Wrestler, you do not stay champion for over one year if you suck. With him, my career in this sport is on to a good start."

Rich Swann - 21 Years - Xtreme Wrestling Mentor: GQ Money
About himself: "Yo, those white bastards put me in jail for dealin' some shit. That social worker hoe wanted me to do this shit. 'Resocialation' or some shit like that."
About his strategy: "Dawg, I've got the street smarts. These white trash bitches don't know shit about my style. Gonna roast them."
About his mentor: "Yeah, I've heard about GQ Money. Seems like one crazy motherfucker. If any of these fuckers can teach me anything, it's him."

Danny King - 23 Years - Xtreme Wrestling Mentor: Villano IV
About himself: "I'm Danny King, one of two sons of Brett King. Since my older brother has taken over our cherry juice company, I've decided to go into viral marketing."
About his strategy: "To promote our product adequately, I have gone for an elegant fighting style involving many elbow drops."
About his mentor: "Villano IV is a legend of Xtreme Wrestling, just like 'King's Choice' is the best drink in the United Kingdom. I hope he will teach me well."

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[Bob Holly]

einige Kommentare der Youtube-Comunity:
"Bachelor of Xtreme: Thumbs up!"
"David Hasselhoff ist einfach Sau Cool! Egal ob auf dem Chefsessel bei TXW oder am Boden liegend mit nem Burger"
"Ein neuer, frischer Wrestler für Total Xtreme Wrestling. Man darf gespannt sein"
"Ein Zehnjahresvertrag über 5 mio.? Wo kann ich unterschreiben?"
"Das mit dem zweitplatzierten, der seinem Mentor den Vertrag klauen kann finde ich ja hart!"
"Oh, nett! Ein viertes prominentes Jury Mitglied. Da darf man sich auf einige Gäste freuen."
"Chikara Sato - klingt interessant, aber mit JLC als Mentor... der arme Kerl"
"Rene Cardinal = David Flair Junior"
"An Rich Swanns Stelle würde ich GQ Money nicht den Rücken zukehren!"
"Danny King ist... na ja, warten wir mal ab!"