*U MUST READ THEM ALL*

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  • Beteiligte Poster: -FB- - Pwntality - -Silent-Miltiades - Denali - W0LFBANE - Anonymous
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  • Forenbeschreibung: Visit our Website
  • aus dem Unterforum: Laugh factory
  • Antworten: 12
  • Forum gestartet am: Mittwoch 04.01.2006
  • Sprache: englisch
  • Link zum Originaltopic: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*
  • Letzte Antwort: vor 18 Jahren, 1 Monat, 24 Tagen, 11 Stunden, 37 Minuten
  • Alle Beiträge und Antworten zu "*U MUST READ THEM ALL*"

    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    -FB- - 23.02.2006, 18:02

    *U MUST READ THEM ALL*
    I havnt laughed so hard as wen i was reading these, these are the best cyber chats on the net ever....check out these romeos...oh yea i thought they were that funny i gave them there own thread, if u cant read them all at 1 sittin u gotta get back 2 em, i nearly wet myself i laughed so hard :lol:


    bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
    j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
    bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
    j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.
    j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
    bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
    j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
    j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
    bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
    j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
    bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They fucking charge your ass.
    j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.
    bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
    bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
    j_gurli3: thats it.
    bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
    bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
    BritneySpears14: Aight.
    bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
    BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
    bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
    BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
    bloodninja: Me too baby.
    BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
    bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
    BritneySpears14: Hey...
    bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.
    BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
    bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty Fuck of the Beyondness.
    BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
    bloodninja: Don't fuck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
    bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
    BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of shit.
    bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
    bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
    bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
    bloodninja: Baby?

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
    eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
    BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
    eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
    BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
    BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
    eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
    BritneySpears14: What the fuck, I told you not to message me again.
    eminemBNJA: Oh shit
    BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you fuck up.
    eminemBNJA: Oh shit
    eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
    Katie_007: Sure, you into vegetables?
    bloodninja: What like gardening an shit?
    Katie_007: Yeah, something like that.
    bloodninja: Nothing turns me on more, check this out:
    bloodninja: You bend over to harvest your radishes.
    (pause)
    Katie_007: is that it?
    bloodninja: You water your tomato patch.
    bloodninja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
    Katie_007: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?
    (pause)
    bloodninja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... sexily.
    bloodninja: I ride your buttocks like they were amber waves of grains.
    Katie_007: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
    bloodninja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
    bloodninja: Damn baby you're right, this shit is HOTT.
    Katie_007: ...
    bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
    Katie_007: What the fuck is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
    bloodninja: Yeah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.
    Katie_007: whatever.


    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    bloodninja: I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch.
    Sarah19fca: mmmm, okay.
    bloodninja: I take yo pants off, grunting like a troll.
    Sarah19fca: Yeah I like it rough.
    bloodninja: I smack you thick booty.
    Sarah19fca: Oh yeah, that feels good.
    bloodninja: Smack, Smack, yeeeaahhh.
    bloodninja: I make some toast and eat it off your ass. Land O' Lakes butter all in your crack. Mmmm.
    Sarah19fca: you like that?
    bloodninja: I peel some bananas.
    Sarah19fca: Oh, what are you gonna do with those?
    bloodninja: get me peanuts. Peanuts from the ballpark.
    Sarah19fca: Peanuts?
    bloodninja: Ken Griffey Jr. Yeaaaaahhh.
    Sarah19fca: What are you talking about?
    bloodninja: I'm spent, I jump down into the alley and smoke a fatty. I throw rocks at the cats.
    Sarah19fca: This is stupid.
    bloodninja: Stone Cold Steve Austin gives me some beer.
    bloodninja: Wanna Wrestle Stone Cold?
    bloodninja: Yeeaahhhh.
    Sarah19fca: /ignore
    bloodninja: Its cool stone cold she was a bitch anyway.
    bloodninja: We get on harleys and ride into the sunset.

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
    DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
    DirtyKate: Who are you?
    bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
    bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
    DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
    bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
    DirtyKate: Haha! OK
    DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
    bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
    DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
    bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
    DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
    DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
    bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
    **pause**
    DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
    bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
    bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
    **pause**
    DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
    bloodninja: How did you know?
    bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
    bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
    DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
    bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
    DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
    bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
    DirtyKate: What the fuck?
    DirtyKate: You perverted piece of shit
    DirtyKate: Fuck


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
    Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
    Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
    Sweetheart: I want you.Would you like to screw me?
    Wellhung: OK
    Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
    Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
    Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
    Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.
    Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
    Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
    Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
    Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.
    Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
    Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
    Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
    Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
    Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
    Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
    Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
    Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
    Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
    Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
    Sweetheart: What?
    Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
    Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
    Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
    Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
    Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
    Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
    Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.
    Sweetheart: What's the matter?
    Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
    Sweetheart: Are you OK?
    Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
    Sweetheart: Can I help?
    Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
    Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
    Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
    Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
    Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
    Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
    Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
    Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
    Wellhung: I found it.
    Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
    Wellhung: Me too.
    Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies pressing each other.
    Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
    Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?
    Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.
    Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
    Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
    Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
    Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
    Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
    Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
    Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
    Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
    Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
    Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know...woman's thing.
    Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
    Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
    Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
    Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
    Sweetheart: What?
    Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
    Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
    Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
    Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
    Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
    Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
    Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
    Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
    Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
    Sweetheart: <logged off>


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    sweet17: Hi
    bloodninja: hello
    bloodninja: who is this?
    sweet17: just a someone?
    bloodninja: A someone I know?
    sweet17: nope
    bloodninja: Then why the hell are you bothering me?
    sweet17: well sorrrrrry
    sweet17: I just wanted to chat with you
    bloodninja: why?
    sweet17: nevermind your an jerk
    bloodninja: Hey wait a minute
    sweet17: yes?
    bloodninja: look I'm sorry. I'm just a little paranoid
    sweet17: paranoid?
    bloodninja: yes
    sweet17: of what?
    sweet17: me?
    bloodninja: No. I'm in hiding.
    sweet17: LOL
    bloodninja: Don't fucking laugh at me!
    bloodninja: This shit is serious!
    sweet17: What are you hiding from?
    bloodninja: The cops.
    sweet17: gimme a fucking break
    bloodninja: I'm serious.
    sweet17: I don't get it
    bloodninja: The cops are after me.
    sweet17: For what?
    bloodninja: I'm wanted in three states
    sweet17: For???
    bloodninja: It's kindof embarrasing.
    bloodninja: I had sex with a turkey.
    bloodninja: Hello?
    sweet17: You are fucking sick.
    bloodninja: Send me your picture.
    sweet17: why?
    bloodninja: so I know you aren't one of them.
    sweet17: One of what?
    bloodninja: The cops.
    sweet17: I'm not a cop i told you
    bloodninja: Then send me your picture.
    sweet17: hold on
    bloodninja: Hurry up.
    bloodninja: Are you there?
    bloodninja: fuck you, cop!
    sweet17: Hey sorry
    sweet17: I had to do something for my mom.
    bloodninja: I thought you were trying to find a picture to send to me.
    bloodninja: When really you were notifying the authorities.
    bloodninja: Weren't you!?
    sweet17: thats not it
    bloodninja: Then what?
    sweet17: I don't want to send you the picture cause I'm not pretty
    bloodninja: Most cops aren't
    sweet17: IM NOT A FUCKING COP YOU DICKSHIT!
    bloodninja: Then send me the picture.
    sweet17: fine. What's your e-mail?
    bloodninja: Just send it through here.
    sweet17: alright *PIC*
    sweet17: Did you get it?
    bloodninja: Hold on. I'm looking.
    sweet17: That was me back in may
    sweet17: I've lost weight since then.
    bloodninja: I hope so
    sweet17: what?!?
    sweet17: that hurt my feelings.
    bloodninja: Did it?
    sweet17: Yes. I'm not that much smaller than that now.
    bloodninja: Will it make you feel better if I send you my picture?
    sweet17: yes
    bloodninja: Alright let me find it.
    sweet17: kks
    bloodninja: Okay here it is. *PIC*
    sweet17: this isn't you.
    bloodninja: I'll be damned if it ain't!
    sweet17: You don't look like that.
    bloodninja: How the hell do you know?
    sweet17: cause your profile has another picture.
    bloodninja: The profile pic is a fake.
    bloodninja: I use it to hide from the cops.
    sweet17: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lol
    bloodninja: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy....
    bloodninja: Not to mention all the groceries.
    sweet17: Go fuck yourself
    bloodninja: I was going to until I saw that picture
    bloodninja: Now my unit won't get hard for a week.
    sweet17: I shouldn't have sent you that picture.
    sweet17: You've done nothing but slam me.
    sweet17: you hurt me.
    bloodninja: And calling me the Farm Fresh guy doesn't hurt me?
    sweet17: I thought you were bullcrapping me!
    bloodninja: Why would I do that?
    sweet17: I can't believe that cops are after you
    bloodninja: I can't believe Santa lets you sit on his lap..
    sweet17: FUCK YOU!!!
    bloodninja: You'd break both of his legs.
    sweet17: You're a fucking wanker!
    sweet17: I've been teased my whole life because of my weight
    sweet17: and you make fun of me when you don't even know me
    bloodninja: Ok. I'm sorry.
    sweet17: No you aren't
    bloodninja: You're right. I'm not.
    bloodninja: HAARRRRR!
    sweet17: I'm done with you
    bloodninja: Aww. I'm sorry.
    sweet17: I'm putting you on ignore
    bloodninja: Wait a sec
    bloodninja: We got off on the wrong foot.
    bloodninja: Wanna start over?
    sweet17: No
    bloodninja: I'll eat your kitty
    sweet17: You'll what?
    bloodninja: You heard me.
    bloodninja: I said I'd eat your kitty.
    sweet17: I thought you said you couldn't get it hard after seeing my picture
    bloodninja: Do I need a hard-on to eat your kitty?
    sweet17: I'd like to know that the man eating me out is excited yes
    bloodninja: Well I'm not like most men.
    bloodninja: I get excited in different ways.
    sweet17: Like what?
    bloodninja: Do you really wanna know?
    sweet17: I don't know
    bloodninja: You have to tell me yes or no.
    sweet17: I'm afraid to
    bloodninja: Why?
    sweet17: cause
    bloodninja: cause why?
    sweet17: well lets see
    sweet17: you say you have sex with turkeys. You call me fat. then you wanna eat me out
    sweet17: doesn't that seem strange to you?
    bloodninja: Nope
    sweet17: well its strange to me
    bloodninja: Fine. I won't do it if you don't want me to
    sweet17: I didn't say that
    bloodninja: So is that a yes?
    sweet17: I guess so.
    bloodninja: Ok. I need your help getting excited though.
    bloodninja: Are you willing?
    sweet17: What do you need me to do?
    bloodninja: I need you talk like a pirate.
    sweet17: ???
    bloodninja: When I start to go limp... you say "HARRRR!!!"
    bloodninja: ok?
    bloodninja: Hello?
    sweet17: You can't be serious
    bloodninja: Oh yes I am!
    bloodninja: It's my fantasy.
    sweet17: this is retarded
    bloodninja: Do you want it or not?
    sweet17: Yes I want it.
    bloodninja: Then you'll do it for me?
    sweet17: sure
    bloodninja: Ok. Here we go.
    bloodninja: I gently remove your panties and being to massage your thighs.
    bloodninja: You get really juicy thinking about my tounge brushing up against them
    bloodninja: I softly begin to tounge your wet kitty.
    bloodninja: I run my tounge up and down your smooth cunt.
    sweet17: mmmm yeah
    bloodninja: uh oh ...going limp.
    sweet17: Har
    bloodninja: You gotta do better than that!
    bloodninja: Your picture was really bad.
    sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRR
    bloodninja: Ahhhh. Much better. I feel your kitty get more moist with every stroke.
    bloodninja: I softly suck on your clit bringing it in and out of my mouth.
    bloodninja: Your juices run down my chin as your scent makes its way to my nose.
    bloodninja: I begin to feel empowered by your femininity.
    sweet17: mmmmmm you are good
    bloodninja: I feel your thighs tighten as I fuck harder
    bloodninja: going limp
    sweet17: HARRRRRRR
    bloodninja: Mmmm I grab your swelling buttocks in my hands.
    bloodninja: You begin to sway back and forth.
    bloodninja: going limp
    sweet17: this is stupid
    bloodninja: ...still limp
    bloodninja: Do it!
    sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRRR
    bloodninja: I turn you around to lick your asshole.
    bloodninja: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.
    bloodninja: I see poo nuggets hanging from the hair around your ass.
    sweet17: WTF?!?!?
    bloodninja: They stink really bad.
    sweet17: OMG STOP!!!
    bloodninja: I start to get fed up with your ugly ass
    bloodninja: I tear off your wooden peg leg.
    bloodninja: I ram it up your ass.
    sweet17: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!
    bloodninja: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.
    bloodninja: And turn you into a fucking candy apple...
    bloodninja: I kick you in the face!
    sweet17: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!!
    bloodninja: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin...
    bloodninja: Your parrot flys away.
    bloodninja: ...going limp again.
    bloodninja: Hello?
    bloodninja: Say it!
    bloodninja: HAARRRRRR!!!!!

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Partner6: So you're really a 18 yr old girl right?
    J-Dogg: Yeah, J for Julie.
    Partner6: So whats with the "Dogg"
    J-Dogg: Uh, It's cause I'm into the latina gangs and shit. You know, rollin with tha homies and shit.
    Partner6: Oh, uh ok thats cool. So you ever seen a gun?
    J-Dogg: Yeah like I got 6 guns.
    Partner6: Thats cool, so you wanna see my gun?
    J-Dogg: hehe, of course baby.
    Partner6: I pull off my pants and show you my "gun".
    J-Dogg: Ohh, it's so big.
    Partner6: Yeah, what you want to do?
    J-Dogg: Umm, i guess stroke it or something.
    Partner6: It likes that.
    J-Dogg: aight.
    Partner6: Keep talking to me baby...
    J-Dogg: I kiss you on the mouth, hard, but then gently.
    Partner6: Mmmm, daddy like.
    J-Dogg: I unzip my pants...
    Partner6: Yes, show me what you got.
    J-Dogg: I pull out my schlong, and rub it on your breasts...
    Partner6: WTF?!
    J-Dogg: Oh shit, I meant, your schlong! your schlong!
    Partner6: I've had it with you queers trying to cyber me, I only fuck women...
    J-Dogg: Shit just don't shoot me man, I wasn't serious about the guns I have, I'm unarmed!
    Partner6: You dipshit.
    J-Dogg: I whimper to myself...
    J-Dogg: please don't shoot me Mr.

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    VictimX_27: Hi there!
    cheesedog: HEYA!
    VictimX_27: What u up 2?
    cheesedog: Nice English.
    cheesedog: Did you learn that on the short bus?
    VictimX_27: Get fucked
    cheesedog: I'm just joking relax
    cheesedog: What's your name?
    VictimX_27: Whats yours?
    cheesedog: I asked you first.
    VictimX_27: I asked you second
    cheesedog: Did I time just warp to middle school?
    VictimX_27: huh
    cheesedog: Never mind. My name is Johnny
    cheesedog: Johnny Cheesedog
    VictimX_27: Thats not your real name
    cheesedog: Why isn't that my real name?
    VictimX_27: No one has the name Cheesedog as a last name
    cheesedog: Well I do. Whats wrong with it?
    VictimX_27: Nothin i suppose
    VictimX_27: Is that your real pic in that av?
    cheesedog: Yes it is
    VictimX_27: Very handsome
    cheesedog: Thanks
    VictimX_27: You kinda look like eminem
    cheesedog: Fuck you.
    VictimX_27: HEY! I meant that in a good way
    VictimX_27: I think eminem is hot!
    cheesedog: Oh. You think I'm hot?
    VictimX_27: Yeah
    cheesedog: What do you look like?
    cheesedog: Do you have a pic?
    VictimX_27: I don't show my picture to anyone
    cheesedog: Why not?
    VictimX_27: Cause I'm ugly
    cheesedog: I won't make fun of you
    VictimX_27: Its not that. I just don't like my looks
    cheesedog: So you have no self-esteem, huh?
    cheesedog: Is that what you're saying?
    VictimX_27: I just don't think I'm pretty
    cheesedog: Let me be the judge of that.
    VictimX_27: Nahhh
    cheesedog: Then describe yourself.
    VictimX_27: Why do u wanna know what I look like?
    cheesedog: Because I think you're nice
    cheesedog: I want to picture you in my head while I'm talking to you.
    VictimX_27: LMAO!! You don't want 2 picture me. Trust me
    cheesedog: Why not?
    VictimX_27: I told you. I'm ugly.
    cheesedog: Well... I think you're beautiful on the inside.
    VictimX_27: You don't even know me
    cheesedog: I'm a pretty good judge of character
    VictimX_27: Then why do u need 2 see me?
    cheesedog: I just wanted to know thats all
    cheesedog: If you aren't comfortable with it... thats fine.
    VictimX_27: You don't understand
    cheesedog: Is it that bad?
    VictimX_27: YESSSSS
    cheesedog: Ok then. I'm gonna picture you as Weezy from the Jeffersons.
    cheesedog: She is the bomb!
    cheesedog: She makes me hot just thinking about her!
    VictimX_27: Wheezy?
    cheesedog: Yep. Weezy.
    VictimX_27: Who is that?
    cheesedog: George's wife.
    VictimX_27: Who is george
    cheesedog: George Jefferson. From the Jeffersons.
    cheesedog: Are you fucking deaf?
    VictimX_27: Who are the Jeffersons?
    cheesedog: Oh lord. Here we go
    VictimX_27: wut?
    cheesedog: You don't know who the Jeffersons are?
    VictimX_27: Should I?
    cheesedog: Yes.
    VictimX_27: Well I don't.
    cheesedog: FISH DONT FRY IN THE KITCHEN! BEANS DONT BURN ON THE GREEEELL...
    VictimX_27: huhhh?
    cheesedog: TOOK A WHOOOOLE LOTTA LU UH VINNNN. JUST TO GET UP THAT HEEEELL
    VictimX_27: Wut the hell are you saying?
    cheesedog: Hold on a second
    cheesedog: Here you go. *PIC*
    VictimX_27: Thats her?
    cheesedog: Yep
    VictimX_27: I don't look anything like that
    cheesedog: SHUT UP! You're ruining my fantasy!
    VictimX_27: LOL. You're funny.
    cheesedog: What's funny?
    VictimX_27: u r
    cheesedog: I'm glad I entertain you
    VictimX_27: me 2
    cheesedog: So if you don't look like Weezy, what do you look like?
    VictimX_27: u don't give up do u?
    cheesedog: Never
    VictimX_27: I'm the exact opposite of her
    cheesedog: ???
    VictimX_27: I'm very white
    cheesedog: Thats cool, my white anti-soul sista'
    VictimX_27: LOL
    cheesedog: I can dig white chicks too, I guess.
    VictimX_27: I'm whiter than most
    cheesedog: really?
    VictimX_27: I'm an albino
    cheesedog: a what?
    VictimX_27: u don't know what that is?
    cheesedog: I've heard the word before
    VictimX_27: I have no pigment in my skin, eyes or hair
    VictimX_27: So I'm all white
    cheesedog: This is bullshit
    VictimX_27: I'm serious!
    VictimX_27: You've never seen an albino before?
    cheesedog: No. Where do they live? Albinia?
    VictimX_27: No, we live all over.
    cheesedog: Then how come I've never seen any
    VictimX_27: Lucky I suppose
    cheesedog: Send me your picture. I wanna know what an albino looks like.
    VictimX_27: I'll send you a picture of one but not me
    cheesedog: Ok
    VictimX_27: Here u go *PIC*
    cheesedog: Whoa. Thats freaky
    VictimX_27: See why I don't send my picture out?
    cheesedog: there's nothing wrong with it.
    cheesedog: It doesn't make you ugly
    cheesedog: This chick is kind of hot actually.
    VictimX_27: Thank u
    cheesedog: No problem
    cheesedog: Her, not you. I don't know what you look like.
    VictimX_27: Are you gonna be on in 3 hours?
    cheesedog: Yes
    VictimX_27: I have to go to the mall with my sister
    VictimX_27: Will you be here when I get back?
    cheesedog: S ure. Then I'll sex you up.
    VictimX_27: Gee thanks. LOL
    cheesedog: I'm serious
    VictimX_27: We'll see.
    cheesedog: Yes we will.
    VictimX_27: Bye for now!
    cheesedog: Make sure you wear some sunscreen.
    VictimX_27: <USER HAS LOGGED OUT>

    About 3 hours later...

    VictimX_27: HEY!
    cheesedog: Hello there
    VictimX_27: I'm back
    cheesedog: Have fun at the mall?
    VictimX_27: Yeah. I got some new shoes
    cheesedog: Interesting
    VictimX_27: Not really. Just shoes
    cheesedog: You ready to be sexed up now?
    VictimX_27: LOL
    cheesedog: Is that a yes?
    VictimX_27: Could be
    VictimX_27:
    cheesedog: HOT DAMN!
    cheesedog: I gently suck your nipples
    cheesedog: I feel them get hard then I jam my hand down your..
    VictimX_27: WOAH! Slow down cowboy
    cheesedog: Why?
    VictimX_27: I'm not just gonna cyber with you if thats all you want
    cheesedog: What do you mean?
    VictimX_27: You're not going to ignore me later are you?
    cheesedog: Of course not.
    cheesedog: I like you.
    VictimX_27: I don't even know how old you are.
    cheesedog: I'm 27. Now....
    cheesedog: I gently massage your breasts with my rough hands
    cheesedog: I roll your nipples between my fingers
    VictimX_27: WAIT!
    cheesedog: They get hard again... what?
    VictimX_27: Don't you wanna know anything about me first?
    VictimX_27: Like what I like?
    cheesedog: Oh yeah. Sure. Hurry up.
    VictimX_27: That didn't sound convincing.
    cheesedog: YES I WANNA KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!
    VictimX_27: Now u r being a smartass
    VictimX_27: Just give me a minute
    cheesedog: ok
    VictimX_27: I'm back
    cheesedog: np
    VictimX_27: thank you
    cheesedog: So what do you like?
    VictimX_27: Ummmm being licked
    cheesedog: Where?
    VictimX_27: Everywhere
    cheesedog: Any place in particular?
    VictimX_27: uhhh yeah
    cheesedog: tell me
    VictimX_27: on my clit
    cheesedog: OK!
    cheesedog: NOW YOU'RE TALKIN!
    VictimX_27: I also like being done from behind
    cheesedog: Ooooooohhhh.
    cheesedog: Ok. Check this out.
    cheesedog: We're in an abandoned building.
    cheesedog: No is around. Its all quiet.
    VictimX_27: Uh huh
    cheesedog: I gently unbutton your pants and slide my hand across your clit
    cheesedog: You get all warm and juicy.
    cheesedog: I slip your panties down and continue to massage your pussy
    VictimX_27: oooohh mmmm
    cheesedog: I place my mouth on your pussy as I eat you from behind
    cheesedog: I wiggle my tounge around across your moist hole
    VictimX_27: yessss
    cheesedog: I cover your ears with my hands as I eat you.
    cheesedog: Egon and Ray sneak in from the back.
    cheesedog: *Powering up Proton packs*
    VictimX_27: ???
    cheesedog: Then... Egon BLASTS your pasty white ass!!
    cheesedog: POW!! BZZZZZTTTTTPHTTTTTT!!!
    cheesedog: Winston and Peter set up the containment trap....
    VictimX_27: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!!!
    cheesedog: You wiggle around in the proton streams buck naked
    cheesedog: The streams almost cross! Look out!!
    cheesedog: Peter smacks you across the chin with his gun
    cheesedog: They open the trap and it sucks your pale ass in!
    VictimX_27: This isn't funny johnny!
    cheesedog: SHUT UP! YOUR CAUGHT!
    cheesedog: **puts you in the containment area**
    cheesedog: Slimer is in there too..
    VictimX_27: YOU ARE A FUCKING ASSHOLE!
    cheesedog: I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!
    cheesedog: Now...Slimer sticks his green, slimey cock in your pigmentless ass.
    cheesedog: **HE SLIMES YOU!**
    VictimX_27: Never talk to me again!
    cheesedog: He cums all over your hair... but no one notices cause its the same color
    VictimX_27: FUCK YOUUUU
    cheesedog: He eats a powdered donut!
    VictimX_27: SHUT UP AND FUCK YOUUUU!!!!!
    cheesedog: o wait! It was your hand, you scary, white whore!
    VictimX_27: LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
    cheesedog: Chill out, Casper. You're trapped, I said.
    cheesedog: Slimer goes to lick your clit.
    cheesedog: But there is already slime on your it!!
    cheesedog: Slimer thinks you are a cheater and gets jealous!!
    cheesedog: HE RIPS YOUR WHITE TITS OFF!
    VictimX_27: FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!
    cheesedog: **Plays volleyball with them**
    VictimX_27: <USER HAS LOGGED OUT>


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    Pwntality - 24.02.2006, 05:27


    wha :x



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    -Silent-Miltiades - 24.02.2006, 14:34


    ...u wrote all this shit?



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    Denali - 24.02.2006, 16:06


    I didnt start to read yet but i have holidays in 4 months then ill do it.



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    -FB- - 24.02.2006, 18:20


    Ya no wot get fucked, i thought it was funny as fuck!!

    And no i didnt write it all myself, there real convo's that have happened online so go fuck urselfs u stupid fucks



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    -Silent-Miltiades - 24.02.2006, 18:25


    lol i lub u fb



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    W0LFBANE - 24.02.2006, 20:25


    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA *takes a deep breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

    Took me a while to read it but fuck, this shit is seriously funny :lloll:



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    W0LFBANE - 24.02.2006, 20:26


    btw, is the ninja guy u fb? :shock: Didnt know u were so funny :?



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    Pwntality - 24.02.2006, 23:22


    He learned from the best.



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    Denali - 26.02.2006, 14:47


    W0LFBANE wrote: btw, is the ninja guy u fb? :shock: Didnt know u were so funny :?

    No i think he is J-Dogg :glol:



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    W0LFBANE - 26.02.2006, 18:46


    :lolii:



    Re: *U MUST READ THEM ALL*

    Anonymous - 02.03.2006, 20:32


    LOL ,thats some good material! :jump:



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